AS they count their dead and wounded, vanquished Tories have but one thing to look forward to . . . a hung Parliament, with Labour barely clinging to power.
Eh? Surely some mistake.
The evidence from Thursday’s bloodbath is that Keir Starmer’s Red Army is on the rampage while Rishi Sunak is leading his party to oblivion.
But no. Experts with brains the size of the planet have studied the results, straightened the wrinkles and discovered the opinion polls showing a 20-point Labour lead are an illusion.
Raw voting figures …